permanent
by findingmysealegs
Summary: There was a time when the very thought of those permanent reminders seemed to be absolutely abysmal. Of course, this was back before the accident. AU F/R


**Tag:** There was a time when the very thought of those permanent reminders seemed to be absolutely abysmal. Of course, this was back before the accident.

**Disclaimer: **I do _not_ own anything relating to Glee nor am I directly involved with any of the creators, writers, directors or actors.

**Author's Note:** It's been a while since I've written. However, I was on Finchel-Prompts when I read one about tattoos and I really wanted to read one but sadly the person behind Finchel-Prompts deleted all filled prompts so I'll never know if it'll be filled. So here we go, this is **my** take on it. I may turn this into a two-parter but for right now it's just this one-shot. I hope you enjoy. c:

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><p><strong>Permanent<strong>

It was the spring of 2009 when the accident happened late on a Friday night. On the corner of Birch and Vancouver where there were trees to block seeing if a car was approaching on the other road. The weather was less than helpful as April showers were hitting Lima, Ohio surprisingly hard. Rachel Berry always questioned this phenomena as that type of rain was far more prominent on the Eastern side of the world.

The air was thick with humidity as the warm rain fell down onto the dark streets. Thankfully the roads had been flattened the year before so the drive home from work for LeRoy Berry wasn't as bumpy as it had been years prior. The dense clouds that darkened the sunset skies countered though and so the cautious man drove a little under the speed limit. Even with this man being overly careful it didn't mean everyone else in town would be.

As he approached the corner there was a crack of ominous thunder and with it he stopped at the stop sign and waited a few minutes. With small steps he drove up to where he could see past the tree right on the corner only to be blinded by headlights coming too fast down the unpaved road intercepting his. He tried to speed away but his tires threw mud in all directions and with another boast from thunder he was hit on the right side.

The next morning the rain had disappeared and the birds were chirping away to the new day. Rachel had opened her eyes to hear unfamiliar voices downstairs. She threw off her comforter and bounded down the stairs to see Hiram speaking to one of the city cops. With worried eyes she watched her father give the officer a description fitting to her other dad. Rachel's brow furrowed and her hand shot to her mouth in an anxious fury. Finally the officer left and Hiram walked over to his daughter, placing his hands carefully on her shoulders.

His words went mute after the first sentence. LeRoy was in an accident. **Her** LeRoy, her _father_ was in an accident. Rachel felt her body go numb as she was unable to feel the gentle hands on her shoulders anymore. Her vision blurred and suddenly she felt weightless as her knees gave out and Hiram caught her in his own, strong arms. The tall man carried her back to he room to let her rest until they were do at the Hospital to complete paperwork.

It was three years since the accident when Rachel Berry finally made the big leap from Lima to New York. It was a difficult decision to make as she had to decide if it was okay to leave her dad by himself, but he guaranteed her that he would be fine as long as he had Bingo every Saturday afternoon.

The move had been quick and in the later part of the summer. By the time Rachel had transported all of her boxes to the small apartment she and three of her friends decided on all of them were drenched in sweat.

"I thought New York was supposed to have fabulous everything, Berry. I'm not sure if I'll be able to put up with this," the sassy Latina complained from the couch she was slumped over, fanning herself with the newspaper from the front desk.

Rachel scoffed, "You were informed of every part of New York before we got here, just be glad that you're in the city of beauty and dreams."

It was Santana's turn to scoff as she turned back to the ceiling, saving her energy for later use. At that moment Kurt and Quinn came through the door with bags of Chinese takeout.

"You would not believe the line we had to wait in. Certainly met a good portion of New York's diverse inhabitants."

Rachel watched Kurt make a face at the carton he took out of the bag and she smiled. She had just finished putting a few of her picture frames on the shelf when her stomach growled lowly. The small girl pressed a kiss to her fingers and then placed them on the picture of her dads before retreating to the kitchen with her new roommates to christen the new table.

After their lunch the four had split off to put away the boxes and after a few hours the group finally met back in the living room, exhausted. It took a good ten minutes for one of them to muster the energy to begin any form of conversation.

"So Rachel, is it so far everything you wanted it to be?"

Rachel turned to Quinn and nodded with a smile. She took a few breaths and wiped her brow before she responded,

"It's so much more. Just the thought of being here is more than anything I felt back in Ohio. I'm really glad you guys came with me, though."

All four of the friends smiled at each other and suddenly Santana stood with some sort of God-like energy after everything they did that day.

"We should do something crazy! We're here now, without anyone telling us what to do or when to be back or who we need to be! Let's go out and do something."

Kurt laughed at the Latina and shook his head,

"And what, pray tell, do you have in mind?"

Santana put a slightly broken manicured nail to his chin and tapped a moment before an imaginary lightbulb went off in her head. With a devilish grin she turned and looked at the small brunette,

"Berry...you have been saying that you wanted a small tattoo, right? For your dad?"

The room went silent for a moment in memory of her father before she nodded and arched a brow at the girl,

"I say a lot of things though, and that was one night when you got me drunk off wine coolers."

Quinn laughed and sat up in her chair,

"Rachel, no one can get drunk off only a few wine coolers. Obviously you want to do it. I think it'd be cool if it's just a small thing for your dad."

Kurt nodded in agreement with her and shrugged,

"We could all get something to mark our first day in New York."

Rachel bit her bottom lip and furrowed her brow as she decided. With a sigh she admitted defeat and nodded. It was time for her to be New York Rachel.

"All right. Someone get the yellow pages."

It had taken nearly a half-hour to find a Tattoo Parlor that was up to Rachel's standards. All of the ones with atrocious names were the first to go as she would say, 'There is no way I'm getting a tattoo from somewhere called Recklass Ink'.

Finally the group found a small business only a few blocks from their apartment. The name wasn't scary and after Santana called for a check-up their prices weren't that bad. The four of them could even receive a discount if the group all went in at once. With an appointment set the group left their new apartment and ventured into the city to kill some time.

At around 4:36 the friends began their trek back to the address that Santana was holding. They glanced around street signs and address numbers until finally they found the small parlor hidden away by a big time restaurant on the left and a book store on the right. Rachel found this to be one of the endearing traits of New York, you could have so much variety everywhere. Things didn't have to match or fit in to belong in New York.

The door bell rung as all four walked into the quaint waiting room. Santana marched up to the desk and removed her glasses,

"We have an appointment. Four for five."

The woman behind the desk was beautiful and had tattoos running up and down her left arm. Her long blonde hair was tied tightly into a ponytail and her name tag read Brittany. She popped her bubble gum and blinked a few times at Santana before looking in the book. With a nod she looked at the group and tapped the pencil she held in her right hand upon her chin a few times,

"We can probably do two at a time. I think only Noah and Finn are working today."

Santana frowned and leaned forward a little more on the desk, not feeling embarrassed to check out the blonde from head to toe. She had come out a little while after Rachel's dad died, saying that life was too short to not be who you truly are.

"Are you sure there is no way we could all go at the same time? This is kind of a big deal."

Brittany shrugged and made an apologetic face. She reached out and held a pinky towards the Latina,

"I pinky swear there is nothing I could do, and I never break my pinky swears."

It was just too endearing and so Santana locked her pinky for a moment with Brittany's before pulling away and walking back to the others,

"There are only two guys working today so there can only be two done at a time."

Kurt made a face and sighed,

"Well I vote Rachel does it for sure first so we can avoid her chickening out. Anyone else wanting to go right away?"

"I'll go with Rachel."

Quinn piped up and folded her arms,

"I want to take a look around town before the shops close so the sooner the better."

Kurt and Santana nodded and retreated to the chairs with Santana whispering in the boy's ear about the cute receptionist.

The girl in question walked from behind the desk to Rachel and Quinn and smiled, leading them to the back rooms. The hallway had four doors, two on each side. The first seemed to be a bathroom with an employee room on the other side. The last two doors looked to be where the magic happens. Rachel and Quinn waved at each other before Brittany escorted Quinn into the room on the far left. Rachel took the time to look around the walls at the different types of tattoos that could be given.

There was a time when the very thought of those permanent reminders seemed to be absolutely abysmal. Of course, this was back before the accident. Years later she had mentioned to Santana how it would be a good homage to her dad, something small but large in meaning.

Brittany came back out of the room and led Rachel to the room on right. With a knock the door was opened by a tall man with brown hair and hazel eyes filled with the talent of understanding.

The blonde left the room and Rachel walked into, smiling at the man. She read his name tag,

"Finn, is it? Hello, my name is Rachel Berry."

Finn smiled (she noticed the dimples) and nodded,

"Yep, that's me. Nice to meet you Rachel."

The two shook hands and Finn gestured for her to take a seat on the chair in the middle of the room. He shut the door and sat himself on the rolling stool next to her,

"So is this your first tattoo?"

"Y-yes. I just felt if there was any time to do it it would be today. My friends and I are new to New York, we actually just finally got settled in today."

Finn nodded and smiled,

"Well that's good, that you guys came here. It's a pretty cool place. Lots of awesome things to do."

Rachel laughed and pushed her hair behind her ear,

"I'm going to be on Broadway so the only way to actually do that is to come here."

Finn's eyes widened and he whistled,

"I have a Broadway-in-the-making here? Well I'll be damned."

Her rolled over to the counter and ripped off a piece of paper, bringing it with him along with a pen. Finn handed it to here and smiled. She looked at him with a confused face and with a laugh he elaborated,

"I'd like to have the first autograph of Broadway legend Rachel..Berry is it?"

Rachel smiled and looked down at the paper. He was being so charming. With a nod she signed her name and drew the ever-present star next to it. She handed the items back to Finn and he smiled down at the paper before sticking the pen behind his ear and turning to the mirror by his table. Finding a thumbtack he tacked the paper on the border surrounding the glass and Rachel took notice of all of the stuff pinned. Movie stubs, concert tickets and photos littered the area,

"You sure do have a lot of stuff up there."

Finn turned around and grinned at her cheekily,

"I guess I just like to remember things."

Rachel didn't say anything back and just smiled down at her knees. Her ankles were crossed and she swung them back and forth. Finn sat back down on the stool and clasped his hands in front of him,

"So...do you have any ideas for what you're looking for?"

With a thoughtful silence the girl hummed,

"What sort of designs do you have to include someone's name?"

"Ah!"

Finn stood and walked over to the cubby next to the door and opened it to take out two books. The binds said the word 'Names' and he opened them, setting them on the desk next to Rachel. He wheeled the desk over to her and flipped through them,

"So are you going for a boyfriend's name? If so we have these fine desi-"

"No. I don't have a boyfriend. It's...actually for my dad. He passed away three years ago."

Finn stopped flipping the book and kept his head down. Slowly he breathed out and looked up at Rachel with sad eyes,

"Aw damn, Rach. I'm sorry."

Rachel felt her face flush a bit at the nickname and at causing such a turn but she just cleared her throat,

"Well...it's been three years. Now's as good a time as any to be literally in remembrance."

Finn smiled softly and nodded. He rolled up the sleeve of the flannel he was wearing to reveal the name 'Christopher' written on the inside of his wrist. There was an American flag behind the name and it was really detailed in the shading.

Rachel reached forward and traced it with her fingertips,

"Was he...?"

Finn nodded and showed a slight shiver as her fingers touched his skin,

"He died when I was really young, like a baby, while fighting. So I got this when I was sixteen. Needless to say my mom wasn't too happy at first but then she understood."

The girl couldn't help but laugh and soon Finn chuckled with her. Rachel thumbed through the book for a little while and finally she picked out a simple design. It was a musical note with a star as the bottom and instead of the flag at the top there would be her father's name.

Finn couldn't help but smile at the cute little design. She had of course added the star bit and he knew that that would be added to the book. With a clap of the hands he looked at her and rose his brows,

"Do you know where you want it at?"

Rachel blushed and shook her head. She felt embarrassed at the lack of readiness she showed in front of him but his laugh made up for it and he sighed,

"You really are a first timer. All right, do we want it to be somewhere seen or somewhere more private?"

The laugh that came from her couldn't be stopped,

"Definitely more private. He'd like it better that way I think and in case I need to get a job where tattoos aren't part of the costume."

Finn nodded and looked at her body. Rachel felt the flush return to her cheeks and she cleared her throat. The boy pulled his eyes from her and in response cleared his own and leaned back in his chair,

"You could put it on your side. A lot of girls do that."

Rachel drew her bottom lip into her mouth and shifted on the seat,

"I was actually thinking somewhere closer to the heart."

With that she ushered out of the light jacket she was wearing over her flower-patterned dress to reveal tan shoulders. Rachel watched Finn's adam's apple move in his throat and she smiled just a bit at his reaction. Her girl blushed deeper as she moved the straps of her dress down and pushed it to reveal the strapless bra she was wearing.

With one hand she lightly touched the spot right above her right breast, following the curve of it to the center of her chest,

"I think it'd look okay right here."

Finn didn't say anything for a minute, his eyes trained on her index finger. With a slow nod he opened his mouth with nothing coming out. Finally his eyes snapped to hers and he smiled again,

"I think that'd look fine. Um, excuse me. I have to go to the...the bathroom!"

Before she could nod or say anything he walked out of the room.

Outside in the hallway Finn battled with himself. A beautiful girl had walked into his room and he was fine up until just moments ago. He was just being charming Finn with a cute smile that helped him a lot during High School. With one look at her bare shoulders he couldn't help himself? With a groan he hit his head against the wall before taking a deep breath and walking back into the room with a forced smile. His grin dropped when he saw that Rachel had pushed the dress further down to her waist and had begun to unclasp her bra.

"W-what are you doing?"

Finn tried his best not to stutter but his words came out airy and unsupported. Rachel seemed to have a hard time with her words herself and fumbled with the clasp that had just came undone,

"I...I thought I'd give you more room. I'm sorry, is this not allowed? I thought I saw on shows how some girls would get all the way naked just to do their sides so I figured this was easier on you to get around to the area."

Finn had tuned out at the mention of the word 'naked' as beautifully haunting images ran through his brain. He sighed and forced another smile,

"It's fine, Rach. I was just surprised. That...would be helpful."

She offered a kind smile and let the clasp fall along with her bra. The once thick air seemed a little colder now and she crossed her arms, feeling insecure. Finn noticed and furrowed his brow. He wondered briefly if she was scared or felt self-conscious. If so she shouldn't feel either of those as it wasn't like he was going to hurt her and if she felt self-conscious then she definitely shouldn't feel that way. She had probably the most beautiful body he's ever seen and that's just the top half.

Finn blinked and then gestured for her to lay down. He turned and picked up the blue marker used to draw out the tattoo and carefully moved her arms to lay down at her sides. It took him a moment to muster up his words as the sight before him enamored his whole being. He had never seen anyone so beautiful as she laid under the lamp with her hair tousled behind her, lip drawn between her teeth and chest slowly rising and falling with each breath. Finn choked out as little words as possible,

"Y-You...wanted it here?"

He placed the tip of the marker where she had shown him earlier but Rachel didn't take her eyes off of his as she nodded. With agile hands Finn set to work on the design, licking his lips every so often as he felt them go dry every time he let out a puff of air. He had completed the marker work and she looked down and smile, lifting a hand to gently touch the drawn lines. With a grateful smile she rubbed her lips together.

It was in that moment that Finn felt heat travel to the lower parts of his body and he was thankful that he didn't have to get up for a little while longer. He cleared his throat and wiped the sweat from his brow,

"So now I'm going to begin the inking, okay? You may feel slight pressure and if it hurts too much just tell me to stop, okay?"

Rachel nodded and without hesitance she took hold of his left hand with her right one and held it just under her ribs,

"Just in case..."

She mumbled and he couldn't help but smile.

With steady hands Finn set to work with the ink. Rachel was doing better than he thought she would but every once in a while he would feel a light squeeze on his hand and she'd breathe out unevenly for a few pants. Finn felt the urge to kiss at the spot he was working at, the urge to place his lips and push away all of the pain she was feeling. Once he was halfway done he gave her a break and she released his hand. He looked at her eyes and frowned at the tears coming down. Finn reached out and stroked away the tears with his thumb,

"Does it hurt?"

Rachel kept her eyes trained on the ceiling and with a shaky breath she answered,

"Every day."

It was then that Finn realized her tears were not for the tattoo she was getting. They were for the past three years that she had to live without her father. After just knowing her for a short while he felt that she was someone who understood him and vice versa. It was crazy how that works out sometimes. Finn took her hand again and stroked the top with his thumb,

"Hey. I bet he's incredibly proud of you. You made it to New York and you're going to make it onto Broadway. You're doing crazy cool things and working on your dreams, something that I bet he would want you to do."

Rachel tore her eyes from the ceiling and looked at his kind, understanding ones. She felt herself get pulled into the small swirl of darker brown around the pupil and her heart swelled at the flecks of gold that lined the edge of the iris. Gold like the stars that she would always have with her.

"Thank you."

Her words were short but she made sure he knew the weight behind them as she gently moved her thumb over his knuckles. He would bet all of his savings that he felt his heart do a flip from the look in her eyes.

After another few seconds Finn got back to work and the atmosphere of the room remained calm for the rest of the time. Once he was finished with the first session he blew against the ink, taking notice of the goosebumps that prickled her tan skin. His hand had never left hers for the second half and throughout it all he would feel her thumb graze against his knuckles. Her eyes watched him work and she felt herself become positively amazed by his work, the steadiness of his hand.

Finn blew again on the ink and his eyes flashed to hers. He felt that fire ignite again and she took a deep breath, watching as his eyes carefully gauged how close he was to her body. She breathed again and this time Finn moved his hand from hers to her stomach, feeling it every time she breathed. Their eyes locked again and she watched him lower his mouth again to let a slow stream of breath out against the lettering. She felt her stomach go taut and his thumb moved over her belly button. Rachel opened her mouth slowly and finally found words,

"You know...you can kiss me if you want to."

His eyes flicked from her eyes to her mouth and bounced the idea around before moving his eyes down to the slightly swollen flesh that he was working on. Finn leaned forward and ever-so-gently placed his lips on the swell of her breast, kissing around the note. Rachel arched slightly against his mouth and she gripped his hand when his kisses opened and became hot. Finn made his way fully around the name and he moved his free hand to her side as he then followed the way to her heart, placing another soft kiss there.

Rachel had closed her eyes, feeling too much. When he stopped she opened them and felt the flush on her cheeks and her eyelids felt heavy,

"W-Why'd you stop?"

Finn couldn't even smile as he felt so taken by the beautiful girl in front of him,

"You're _so_ beautiful."

Rachel watched him move his hand from her side to her cheek and he traced under her eye with his thumb. He was getting closer and closer, she could feel the puffs of hot air that he left in a trail from her chest.

The sound of knocking pushed them away from each other and Finn sat himself firmly back on the stool as Rachel remained laying down and panted slightly. His eyes were dark as he regarded her and he had to keep his hands in his lap to avoid further embarrassment in front of whoever was at the door.

After only another moment Brittany came in and looked around the room,

"I hate to rush you Finn but there are two other people and even though she's hot as hell that Santana girl is getting impatient."

Finn nodded and smiled at the blonde,

"I'm done here, thank you Brittany."

She returned the nod and shut the door, popping the gum as she went. Rachel had returned breathing to normal and she sat up, swinging her legs back to the side. Finn wheeled over to her with a small patch to put over the fresh ink and neither looked at each other. She put her bra back on and pulled the dress back into place, leaving the cover off. Finally her eyes met his and he smiled just a bit,

"It was really nice to meet you, Rachel."

Rachel smiled and nodded, standing up on only slightly shaky legs. Finn waited a moment longer and stood when he was finally ready and opened the door,

"We still have session two, y'know. That's when all of the good stuff happens."

Rachel smiled to herself and walked out of the room. Before she was completely out of there he reached forward and grabbed her hand, bringing her back inside the room. He held her there only for a moment long enough to place his hand upon her cheek and bring his lips down to hers for only a second. When he pulled away she smiled and arched a brow at him.

"You said I could if I wanted to."

He spoke playfully and shrugged,

"I really wanted to."

Rachel couldn't help but smile at his dimples and she walked out to the waiting room. He smiled what was his interpretation of the cheesiest smile ever and waited for the next person to come in.

Nothing would ruin his day and he couldn't wait until Session Two with Rachel Berry


End file.
